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Saturday, July 14, 2007

Gimme a head with hair...

I got a letter from my insurance company last week asking for my doctor's proof that I am taking some medication for it's intended purpose and not for cosmetic reasons. It turns out that not only does Avodart shrink your Prostate, but it also promotes hair growth in men with male pattern baldness, apparently better than Propecia.

Interrobang-big

Eleven years go I chopped off my shoulder length hair because my friend Kevin told me it looked like a comb over, and I've been competely shorn for the past 4 years at least. I've gotten used to it and enjoy slapping my bald head.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about using medical treatment to improve one's looks. I got a nose job in '87 to fix my Hebrew Honker and in '88 I had my jaw reset to fix an underbite (another reason I don't want to pass my genes along), but the hair...well that's just stereotypical male vanity. I would never ask a doctor to hook me up. But would I turn down a freebie?
Shining


Oddly enough, before I discovered this, I noticed on a lower level of consciousness that over the past few weeks that it seemed like my hair growth on a shaving day seemed more like 5 days than it's usual 3, but I just wrote it off.

Since I've been very busy at work, I asked Alessandra to visualize how I would look if I did indeed actually grew hair, then let it grow out.

She likes this one.

hairblond

But I think the sad fact would be this one.

hairfabio

I have a great dome. I think I'll keep it nice and shiny.

Plattner Dreams:

She asks me why
I'm just a hairy guy
I'm hairy noon and night
Hair that's a fright
I'm hairy high and low
Don't ask me why
Don't know
It's not for lack of break
Like the Grateful Dead
Darling

Gimme head with hair
Long beautiful hair
Shining, gleaming,
Streaming, flaxen, waxen

Give me down to there hair
Shoulder length or longer
Here baby, there mama
Everywhere daddy daddy

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair

Let it fly in the breeze
And get caught in the trees
Give a home to the fleas in my hair
A home for fleas
A hive for bees
A nest for birds
There ain't no words
For the beauty, the splendor, the wonder
Of my...

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair

I want it long, straight, curly, fuzzy
Snaggy, shaggy, ratty, matty
Oily, greasy, fleecy
Shining, gleaming, streaming
Flaxen, waxen
Knotted, polka-dotted
Twisted, beaded, braided
Powdered, flowered, and confettied
Bangled, tangled, spangled, and spaghettied!

Oh say can you see
My eyes if you can
Then my hair's too short

Down to here
Down to there
Down to where
It stops by itself

They'll be ga ga at the go go
When they see me in my toga
My toga made of blond
Brilliantined
Biblical hair

My hair like Jesus wore it
Hallelujah I adore it
Hallelujah Mary loved her son
Why don't my mother love me?

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair

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